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| For the past several months, I've hosted an IRC chat room entitled
#MaleChastityDevices. Many opinions and fantasies are voiced there.
Several misconceptions are shared as well. My intent in writing this
article is to share my views on turning the chastity fantasy into reality
within the realm of Lifestyle D/s, as well as to detail my personal
preferences for the use of such devices. Once again, the opinions here are
not presented as the end-all, know-all of chastity devices. They're just
my (not so) humble opinion, having grown from my interests and experiences
in this area. Your mileage may vary :)
- The Chastity Fantasy -
In my article, Adding D/s To
Your Relationship, I address the 'gift of orgasm' as an
adjunct to the submission to your significant other. There is no question
that placing the control of your pleasure solely into the hands of your
partner; refraining from orgasm for as long as your partner chooses,
without complaint, is a pure act of submission.
It may seem logical that the use of a chastity device
would be a natural extension of the submissive act. However, I've been
examining the fantasies shared in my IRC channel and on wonderful web
sites such as Altairboy's, and have a few observations. They generally
have common themes, usually revolving around the attachment of a device
(voluntarily, coerced, or forced) and the use of the device over extended
periods of time (I've seen stories of up to 5 years - with 'milking').
Often the 'victim' is cuckolded; forced to watch his partner have sex with
others while he has no hope of relief. The man often requests or feels he
deserves the treatment (he has been unfaithful, can't control his
masturbation, etc.) and, almost unanimously, the man becomes a better
helper, more attentive, more caring, etc. In short, thanks to this device
and his partner's control of his testosterone level, he suddenly becomes
submissive. There are even web sites, supposedly written by and dedicated
to women, to educate us on the benefits of keeping our men in chastity
devices (I suspect these web sites are written by men in the hopes that
their wives might read them...but I have no proof of
that).
If you've read my
articles, you probably already know my opinion on these fantasies. They
make great fantasies for playtime or as treats, but they have nothing to
do with submission. The fact is, a truly submissive man will retain his
chastity without such a device AND he will work hard to avoid letting his
testosterone level effect his performance as a submissive.
The dominant woman should expect all
the 'benefits' without needing to resort to the use of artificial or
physical means of 'enforcement'. So where does the use of a chastity
device fit into a lifestyle D/s relationship?
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